REJECTED—BUT NOT DEJECTED

I received another rejection letter this week—my second in my quest for publication. {{Big Sigh.}} I don’t handle rejection well, I’m afraid. My self-confidence plummets. I start believing that I am delusional; just kidding myself that I can really write. My determination to pursue publishing my work slips away and I want to just forget it and concentrate on writing for the pleasure of it and for the two dozen or so young readers who already love my books.

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I confess, I was dejected when I got that letter of rejection—for about eight or nine hours. I cried. I moped around. I told Robbie, “Mommy’s sad today,” hoping for a little sympathy from him, I guess. I didn’t get it. I didn’t get any sympathy from Bob, either—just a pep talk to keep at it. I didn’t really want to hear that just then.

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Maybe I would have handled it better if I hadn’t received a critique, as well, from the associate editor who had read my manuscript. At first I was excited that she had sent it. I don’t believe that is the norm—they usually send a letter that says thanks, but no thanks, and that is it. She had taken the time to actually critique my work, however, and send me a list of suggestions on how to improve it. I don’t have a problem at all with constructive criticism and trying to learn from it. The more I read it, though, the more disheartened I became.

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The manuscript I sent was for the first book in my Noble Heart series. (For those of you who have read the first edition of this book, I had added two more chapters and pumped it up a bit all the way through in this revision.) The editor didn’t have anything positive to say about it. The plot, she said, needed more tension. The major criticism of the characters was that some of them were too flat (i.e. "Noble - Just as his name implies, Noble's heart is in the right place and he always says and does the right thing. A perfect person doesn't need to grow; therefore Noble is a flat character.")
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I understood most of the criticisms, and plan take them to heart and work on those problems. I had reasons and had made a conscious decision, however, in some of those areas to write the way I did because I wanted the plot or character written precisely that way. For example, I wanted Noble to be "noble" and of high character and a good role model. He did struggle with loneliness and fear in this book, and I thought he did grow in his faith, but perhaps I did not write that part strongly enough. Perhaps the plot did not have enough tension because I don't want a lot of violence in my books. I will have to work on other ways to increase the suspense, I guess. I was not trying to make excuses, but just thinking through the reasons I wrote the characters and plot the way I did. There was actually only one critique that I thought was off base and that was when she said Noble had had only one encounter with his enemies before the climax of the book. That was not true—he had numerous clashes with them before the climax, but apparently she forgot that.
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I know I probably sound defensive, and I suppose I am a bit. Writing a book is like having a child—when you’ve given it your all for months and have finally finished what you think is something beautiful, you’re proud of it and will defend it like a mama bear! So, although I was actually grateful for her critique and hope to learn from it, it was a little hard to take, too.
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As I said, I was down and dejected. A couple things happened later that evening, though, that turned me around. One of them was receiving an encouraging e-mail from another author who has been published. He was the one who had put me in touch with the publisher, so when I finally heard from them, I e-mailed him to let him know about the rejection. He had a number of things to say to encourage me, including telling me about the dozens of rejections he had received. Then he said, “Never let a rejection discourage you. It should challenge you.” That was just what I needed to hear. Then he went on to tell me that the all time best selling series ever written, Chicken Soup for the Soul, was rejected by no less than 49 publishers! I know I don’t have the fortitude to stick to it through 49 rejections, but maybe I could handle a few more, after all.
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The second thing that happened was a conversation I had on the phone with my granddaughter Sara. I had just told her about the rejection letter, and was about to tell her that I was not going to pursue trying to publish that book. Before I could get the words out, though, she said, “Grandma, I am so proud of you that you keep trying anyway to get your work published!” Whoops! How could I disappoint my grandchild, or have her think less of me because I quit? I had to start re-thinking my feelings about this. It lifted my spirits to have her voice such confidence in me, when I didn’t have that confidence myself.
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So, rejected I may be, but I’m no longer feeling dejected. I will pick myself up and try again, if not with this series, then with one of my others. For now, I have to finish the book I am working on before I can get involved with sending another manuscript off. Trying to get published takes a lot of time and hard work—time and effort I need to and would much rather put into writing creatively.
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This experience, though, had me thinking about how often we are tempted to quit when things don’t go our way, or someone criticizes us, or we feel inadequate. My mother used to often tell me that I came from good, strong, pioneer stock. Pioneers who didn’t quit when things got tough, but who pressed on; pioneers whose backbones were made of determination, perseverance and resolve. They shouldered their responsibilities, they fulfilled their obligations, they did their duty. My pioneer ancestors endured the hard times and setbacks, they rose above the obstacles and failures, they did their best and they didn’t quit.
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Those good, hardy genes run within me. I feel the spirit of those pioneers who have gone before me, and yet there are often times when I am tempted to quit. The important thing is not to give into that temptation. The Lord gives us encouragement and strength in His Word when we feel weak and disheartened. We must not quit:
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When things don’t go our way – Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” (NLT) Did it ever occur to us that all these hopes and dreams and plans we have for ourselves may not be the even more wonderful plans that God has for us instead? We wonder why the Lord doesn’t bring us what we want when He has something better in store for us. His plan may not include the worldly acclaim or wealth that we envision as symbols of our success. His plans for us may be humble and small and not recognized by anyone else, but great in His eyes when we obediently and faithfully fulfill His will for our lives.
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To tell the truth, I don’t really care if my books are published or not as long as they are used by the Lord somehow in the lives of the kids who read them. I have felt for some time that, above all, I want my writing to be a ministry for His honor and glory. Oh, the money, earthly success, seeing my name in print in the bookstores and being able to say that I am not only an author, but a published author, would be nice, but they rank far, far below my desire to have my work be a ministry first and foremost. If He wants me to use my writing for Him as a ministry, then it is up to Him how large or small that ministry is. He will open doors if He wants me to reach more people.
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From the time I was a little child Proverbs 3:5, 6 was special to me. It says, “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.” I don’t know what the Lord has in store for me. I just have to trust Him, follow His path for me and not quit. Someday I hope to hear His words, “Well done, thou good and faithful servant!”
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When we are criticized – Criticism, even constructive criticism, is often hard to take. Our pride may be hurt. Our defenses rise up and our self-esteem goes down. We are tempted to rush to react or respond; sometimes in negative ways. We may even want to quit.
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There are many times when the criticism we receive is unjustified, undeserved or even untrue. I think at those times we just have to shrug it off and remember that God alone is our judge. He knows our heart and our motives. Remember Job and his so-called friends? They had no idea what the Lord was doing in Job's life, or why He allowed all those things to happen, but they sat back and oh, so self-righteously shot off their mouths, giving their opinions and advice. They themselves were just as much a part of the trials Job was going through as the rest of it. It is at those times that we need to simply remember that His Word tells us, “What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?” (Romans 8:31.)
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There are other times, however, when we need to listen to constructive criticism and learn from it. Sure, I was not happy about the list of criticisms I received from that editor, but I would be a fool not to pay attention and try to learn something from them. In fact Proverbs 12:15 says, “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes: but he that hearkeneth unto counsel is wise.” Proverbs 19:20 backs that up, “Hear counsel, and receive instruction, that thou mayest be wise in thy latter end.” Forget the hit to our pride. Learn, grow and go one. Don’t quit.
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When we feel inadequate – This is the hardest one for me to overcome. I have struggled with self-esteem issues most of my life. When you feel that you've failed in the past, when your sisters all have wonderful careers and you are "just a housewife," when you're struggling with weight, etc., it's really easy to feel that you just don't measure up.
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We need to stop comparing ourselves to others. God made us just the way we are and set each of us on our own unique path. His creation (us) was good and His plans for us are good. If nothing else can lift our self-esteem, these words ought to: “How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! How great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.” (Psalm 139:17, 18) He is always thinking of us, always loving us. If He thinks we're worth that much, why shouldn't we realize our worth, too? We need to see ourselves the way God sees as—as His children who are of such infinite value and worth that He gave His Son for us. That is precious, isn’t it?
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Okay, this is where I have to confess—I do have an ego! I still burst out laughing out loud sometimes after re-reading something I’ve written for the tenth time. I can still move myself to tears at something I’ve written that tugs at the heartstrings. Boy, if that isn’t egotistical, I don’t know what is! My self-confidence when it comes to writing, however, is fragile. Criticism, or even the lack of any feedback, starts me questioning if I’m really good enough or if I’m just kidding myself. Like a lot of men I know, my ego needs to be stroked a lot. :-) (Just kidding, Honey!) Thank goodness, my grandchildren are really great at that! It is the self-doubt and lack of confidence that brings me down.
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The Bible has something to say about that, too. Philippians 1:6 says, “Being confident of this very thing, that He which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ.” If this truly is a ministry that He has called me to, then I don’t need self-confidence—I just need to put my confidence in Him! He has promised to work in me and through me until His work for me here is over. We are told in Psalm 37:5, “Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in Him; and He shall bring it to pass.” How simple is that? Place my work in His hands, trust Him with it, and let Him do what He wills with it!
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We cannot allow blows to our ego, hits to our pride or knocks to our self-confidence (whatever you want to call it!) discourage us from the work He has called us to do! We need to pick ourselves up and get right back to work! Just don’t quit!
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Keep on “keeping on!” Philippians 3:13, 14 says, “Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” Forget about the past failures. Forget about the past successes! We are to reach for the work that God has called us to do; to press on and not quit.

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The pastor I grew up with for over twenty-five years was fond of a poem called Don’t Quit and every once and a while he would pull it out and use it with one of his messages. Lo, and behold—I was able to find it on the internet in about two seconds flat! Here it is. Although I did not write it, it is a little inspiration for all of us from my past:

DON’T QUIT

When things go wrong as they sometimes will,

When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill;
When funds are low and the debts are high,

And you want to smile, but you have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit,

Rest, if you must, but don’t you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns

As every one of us sometimes learns.
And many a failure turns about.

When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don’t give up though the pace seems slow –

You may succeed with another blow.
Success is failure turned inside out,

The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are.

It may be near when it seems so far.
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit –

It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit.

- Author unknown -